Introduction Understand the EXACT process of Anxiety Panic Awarded 5 stars by UK Mental Health Foundation fear panic obsessive worry stress

Think Calm, Don't Force Calm

Firstly, 'why' is relaxing important?

Walking the tightrope...
The main thing is that we are intense characters - this can indeed be avery good thing as we 'care' and worry and want things to be right. This can also be the characteristic of somebody who is very creative/highly inteliigent. However, walking the tightrope is probably the best description of how life can be - with the many stresses and imperfections in life, this can lead to high levels of anxiety which can build up into a destructive 'reactive' phase.

Nevertheless we cannot change that basic chractistic which is us - and this is where that genetic reasoning comes in - not everyone is the same but my biggest learning curve was to understand ''we can't help what comes in, but we can help what goes out'' - or more importantly it's the way we 'deal' with our stresses that really counts.

If you see my YouTube video, this explains the processes of how stress and tension can make us spike.
This then leads to a choice which unfortunately for so many is to panic react..and this reaction is typified by us tensing up 'more' trying too hard to control that stress.

As you will see below - there can be multiple events when we are living on that tightrope so we just need to understand that we can 'deflate' away from that temptation 'each' time it rises up... in the direction of being calmer - but we can never force it.

So, if you read this in more detail, you will see that my findings and understanding through time have identified that 'when' we are negative or tense - we 'spike'.

The spike is typified by us suddenly feeling uncomfortable with our thoughts. It is actually 'also' the point at which we are actually coming 'out' of those thoughts ('recognition point').

Needless to say, being relaxed with a clear mind is essential for good mental and physical health... BUT the big mistake I made was I tried too hard to achieve this - expecting total control of my ills and all this did was actually make me tense up further.

In a nutshell, relaxing is something we only have control of in our moment - therefore if we try to panic force relaxing, it won't happen.

Relaxing can only be done momentarily and has to be a gradual 'chipping away' process i.e. 'when we spike/become aware of our stress...we just need a brief mental calming, like taking our foot off the pedal, and that will help us to flow on to other thoughts/let go of our over-controlling 'urge' and take us 'away' from panic over-controlling that stress.

Indeed, many of my Advice Column sections deal with sufferers of 'negative overload' where they seem to have a barrage of negative stressful thoughts and just don't know how to deal with it. This website and book will show you how to successfully achieve a calmer state - even though temptation will inevitably be around the corner - our habits if successfully dealing with spikes will move us onwards and upwards if we persevere patiently with that tightrope existence.